My thoughts bring me to the idea that I will die alone. I have been alone for so long I don’t know what love is. Sex does a really good job of fucking shit up. I wish I could process emotion a little better, it would make me more of a human.
Time means nothing to me anymore, It is sunrise and sunset. I try and plan my route in order to be at my destination by sunfall, I am driving around the country because I want to see the country so therefore no night driving. I am always in a constant race with the sun. We were in a bitter bout, the sun and I, and the Grand Canyon. There is no reason to go to the canyon if it is dark out, so I sped, like the dickens, to get there before the sun journeyed into the western sky. I had made it in perfect timing and if you ask me, I made it at the best time to ever see the Grand Canyon. I can’t really explain the beauty or the feelings I have felt. You just had to be there, no picture will ever do it justice.
Las Vegas. I had journeyed up through the 95 over st 40west and up the Mojave Desert just to get to one town. When I say town, I really mean city, and when I say city, I mean Disco Ball of lights. I had arrived to Vegas. It was glorious, stimulating, exciting, and seducing me. There was just so much to do that I couldn’t figure out what to do so I drove up and down the strip in awe. This is when I decided that I couldn’t do any of it. I needed my ladies with me, I needed my Wednesday night crew in order to taken on this mammoth. Fremont was recommended to me. I had found a motel so seedy that when I checked in they gave me the key, parking pass, and the remote to my T.V. The place had smelled if they had rubbed glade plug-ins all over everything that was visible surface, and it was as hot as the underside of boobs on the 4th of July. I relaxed, put on my face and hit the strip. Vegas is a funny place, I am glad I only stayed one night by myself. It is a place for packs, and partners in crime; rolling lone wolf doesn’t really make the cut. I tried my damnest to make conversation with the drunks and sluts, but nothing could stick. Groups would interact with other grouplets, and couples could throw down socially, but its impossible to be single individual in Vegas. I drank some tall boys and walked up and down the strip and made many observations. There was glitter in the ashtrays and there were boys drinking bud light limes(sprite) and “street performers” tried to make a couple of bucks dressed as Mickey, Minnie, Sponge Bob and the saddest chipmunk that I had ever seen. My night ended outside of the motel smoking cigarettes with the security guard, Paul, who used to live in Susanville California. Strange Place, nothing happened in Vegas and nothing stayed in Vegas, I am still traveling with my whole life.